murphy week!
July 3, 2008
OK, so who is “Murphy” anyway—as in “Murphy’s Law?” I googled it and found this:
It was named after Capt. Edward A. Murphy, an engineer working on Air Force Project MX981, (a project) designed to see how much sudden deceleration a person can stand in a crash.
One day, after finding that a transducer was wired wrong, he cursed the technician responsible and said, “If there is any way to do it wrong, he’ll find it.”
The contractor’s project manager kept a list of “laws” and added this one, which he called Murphy’s Law.
Well, my Murphy Week all started with a letter from our mortgage lender stating that our interest rate was going up in September, 08…
NOOOO, wait, we have a 30 year fixed loan!!!! A few phone calls later and frantic leafing through our closing papers revealed that we had indeed signed a ARM loan… We were snookered!! I’m outraged. Our monthly payment is going UP drastically! So, in light of no job in sight, we’ve turned all of our attention toward getting this house in tip-top shape to put in on the market in two weeks. We’ve been planning to do this since Nathan was born and kept putting the date up. Renovating a house is expensive and stressful! But now we’re on the fast track. We called the realtor and a team is coming next week to price the house, guide us on the miserable task of “staging” and away we go….
Of course our panic could all change in a moment if an interview miraculously became a job. Then we’d breathe.
Anyway, we’ve been cleaning, purging, fixing, and packing all week.
Then today….Nathan had an echo scheduled to check on the ASD hole in his heart. It was 6mm when he was born. The cardiologist and surgeon both said at 6 months that Nathan would most likely need to have surgery. Well at 24 months it had shrunk to 3mm. Surgery canceled. But we still needed to check it every 6 months…which was today. I dashed off to Nathan’s echo today as usual. I wasn’t late, but there wasn’t much time to spare. I pulled into the parking garage like I have at least 50 times… and… heard the most horrible sound on my van’s roof. A lady going to her car looked at me and put her hands up for me to STOP!!! Then it hit me…we still had the luggage carrier on our roof from our recent trip. I was trapped and holding up traffic… and Nathan’s appointment was in 12 minutes!!!! Nathan started to scream, Miika started to cry, asking me what happened, a parking attendant came out of the booth and suggested that I let all the air out of my tires. Huhh?? You’ve got to be kidding!!! I tried to call Paul to come rescue me, but my cell phone was dead. John, the parking guy, let me use his. I broke the news to Paul that I’d inadvertently smashed the luggage carrier, “I have to get to this appointment, I can’t reschedule…take 290 to Damen, go South to Taylor…” I was blocking 4 parked cars and all the incoming traffic. Somehow I managed to move the van back and forth to get out of the way. I entrusted John the parking guy with the key to my van, got the kids out, all Nathan’s files, stroller, purse, snacks, etc. and we ran to the appointment…arriving with 2 minutes to spare.
Nathan hates to go to any doctor. He fought with the nurse who wanted to get his blood pressure. He screamed when the cardiologist came at him with her stethoscope, and finally the poor radiologist had to work very fast to get a good look at his heart while he wiggled and screamed in my arms. By the time we were done both of us were covered in the gel that helps the echo-thingy slide on skin. Miika was simply the trooper and cheerleader. After all of that, there was no hole to be found. ASD ALL GONE! Whewwwwhhhhhh…
Miraculously, Paul had come, gone and rescued me. The van’s luggage rack was gone and the van was parked. As I loaded the kids, I said to Miika, “Mommy does not want to chat, OK? Do you know what ’stress’ means?”
We came home to hammering, and a flurry of activity. Our friend Tony was here hanging doors, helping Paul paint, moving big furniture that I can’t budge. But despite all this ruckus, I feel a deep sense of peace. Nathan’s heart is just fine.
Yesterday, another bright light…
We used to have a collie. But I couldn’t handle him, so we sold him to a wonderful retired couple. We still keep in touch. It’s kind of like I’m the birth mom and they are the adoptive parents. Every time I see Winslow, he’s 10 pounds bigger. Anyway, Elaine, Winslow’s new mom brought us a huge box of clothes for Miika that someone has given her—most with the tags still on. BEAUTIFUL, but practical clothes! I didn’t really look at the items until Elaine and Winslow left. But it made me cry, because it was just a random gift from God. I didn’t ask for it. He just brought it. It’s like the rare occasions that I’m shopping alone and I see something that my kids don’t need, but I know they would like to have, and I splurge and pay full price for it.
“If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” Matthew 7:11
I almost forgot to mention that on my way to UIC for Nathan’s echo, I felt this strange urge to pay close attention to my route in case I needed to tell Paul how to get to one of our appointments some day. I know the way but probably would stumble on the street names if I had to give directions. Only after I was on my way back home, did it dawn on me that God knew I’d have a little accident today. He also knows that we only have 3 more of Paul’s paychecks coming. And God knows what’s next for us. All I know is that I’m supposed to pack, polish and trust.
raising black swallowtails
June 26, 2008
Last week while I was poking around in the back yard garden, I found two caterpillars on my parsley plants. Miika spotted them too and begged me to keep them. At first I thought, no…let them be free…then I thought better of it. I picked the part of the parsley that they were eating and put them in a big jar. Early Sunday morning, I looked them up on line and discovered that they were Black Swallowtails…well worth keeping! I found a good site that gave instructions on how raise them: Kids and Caterpillars. On Monday, I got an old aquarium out of our garage, cleaned it up and transplanted some parsley into a tiny pot. They like to hook up to twigs when they create their chrysalis, so I stacked some up like a tee-pee. While were were out on Tuesday morning, the first one built his little house.
The second caterpillar slowed down yesterday, found his spot on another twig and made a little sling, two strands of what looks like spider web. We’re keeping our eyes on him, hoping to see the chrysalis forming since we missed the first one.
Nathan totally gets it! You see, I’ve read, “The Hungry Caterpillar” at least 1000 times! I told him about the one who has built a little house and how he’d be a BEAUTIFUL butterfly soon. While the other one was eating, I told him how hungry he was. Nathan nodded with excitement and pointed to the caterpillar. Oh, and by the way, caterpillars poop alot, so we discussed that too! To which Nathan replied, “BLAAHHH.”
Raymond C. Whitlock III
June 24, 2008
But we called him Rai.
As far as I know, he did not smoke a day in his life, but cancer went after his lungs, his brain, and his bones and took him away from his family and friends on June 19, 2008.
I don’t think I’ve ever known a more unpretentious and generous creative soul than Rai. He was never in a hurry and he had an openness that allowed his friends to tell him anything. He was always curious about our projects and ideas and would draw out the shyest heart.
Rai was an artist every minute of every day and his mind’s eye was always open. He could see and connect in-congruency by giving value to seemingly unrelated, ordinary objects and situations. He created a piece of art every week for his friends—a vehicle to gather us for a cup of coffee early Friday mornings. My attendance these past 7 years was sparse because of distance and children. But Rai always included me in his invitations.
Back in 2001, I had the opportunity to walk the streets of San Fransisco with Rai and my friends from CTi. I watched him see and caught him and “Charlie” in the photo above while all of us were taking in the city. Yesterday was his funeral and ironically on the cover of his program was his last composition in a cigar box. Old Man Charlie (cancer) took our beloved Rai away. Maybe it was the second hand smoke in his childhood home in Rome or a weak link in his DNA. Ultimately I have to accept that it was just Rai’s time to go home and Jesus took his hand over the threshold of heaven. It’s so hard to say goodbye to my treasure-hunting, soul-searching, garbage-picking friend Rai, who always had his eyes to the ground looking for bits with which to compose. I’m better off just saying, “See ya later.” God has placed artifacts all over heaven’s soil for you to find forever, my friend!
scrappythriftyuniverse
June 20, 2008
Yesterday I made a pilgrimage up to Misercordia to check out their facility. I’m on a fact finding mission to see how The Picky Peasant fits into the universe! I wanted to see what the residents were making and selling in the gift shop and how their restaurant looked. What a happy, busy place. It was just bubbling with excitement! I was a little disappointed that there were not more handcrafted items made by people with disabilities, but I did stumble upon a wonderful creation by a little one-lady company in Chicago called Scrappy Nation. Here are some of her little creatures:
It was like meeting a kindred spirit. Sarah Steedman goes thrifting for scraps and creates huggable, loveable little beasts in her basement studio.
But back to Misercordia… I’ve seen folks collecting change at intersections for years and always wondered what it was. When Nathan was born I discovered that it’s a large organization that serves people with disabilities. Now that I’ve seen the campus and met some of the volunteers, I’ll be digging deeper in my pockets for dollar bills next time I see people collecting change at red lights. Misercordia is like a beautiful village that houses, employs, develops, strengthens, and supports people with disabilities. It’s vibrant. The energy level in the restaurant and bakery was electric. There is nothing about the place that says, “INSTITUTION.” But in contrast it’s like an oasis of historic buildings that mingle with accessible ranch-style townhomes, gardens, trees, wide sidewalks…a thriving environment. So, throw a $20 in the bucket next time you see people wearing the red heart aprons at redlights!
road maps and road trips
June 19, 2008
We escaped Chicagoland last weekend and took a long road trip, swooping down south and back in a big loop…taking in the mountains, the prairies, a concert, some treasure hunting, an aquarium and along the miles, I read a great book: Road Map to Holland by Jennifer Graf-Groneberg. It’s a deep look into the first two years of raising a child with Down syndrome. She gave birth prematurely to twins, Avery and Bennett and was shocked to discover that Avery had DS. I could not put this book down. It was like looking in the mirror. I was mesmerized by the simplest of Jennifer’s daily routines with her children. Her writing style is captivating and descriptive….LOVED IT!! After reading The Memory Keeper’s Daughter last year, Jennifer’s book was very refreshing because it is real and all about NOW.
Here are a few snaps from our trip:
Miika and the exterior wall of an empty restaurant in Paducah, Kentucky.
Our little mermaid…
…and Nathan the engineer.
It’s fun to go on trips and so good to be home!
my world
June 12, 2008
Word Girl and Captin Huggy Face…Actually, Nathan is Mr. Sun and Miika is Miss 1000-words-a-minute. Nathan sees the sun in everything and makes us sing, “Mr. Sun” at least 88 times a day. Miika is our chatterbox. If her eyes are open, so is her mouth. But that’s OK…they fill our world with sugar, spice and sunshine.
pillars of fire by night
June 11, 2008
I keep telling myself that there’s a big picture that God has drawn out for us. He will take care of all our needs. If I look back, I have stones of remembrance of times when God miraculously supplied our needs…a mystery wad of cash, a check in the mail, a friend who offered to and did pay for Paul’s tuition to get his teacher’s certification, a boss who gave us an advance chunk of money to buy our first home and let us work overtime for a year to pay him back…but still I’m scared and ashamed to be scared. Paul’s last day of school was Monday. We’re in uncharted territory…wilderness…I’m thinking of those silly Israelites wh0 would not trust God either. God gave them a pillar of fire by night and a pillar of clouds by day and they just got used to it. They also got used to the manna that fell out of the sky every day and the quail running around their feet just waiting to be eaten—the easiest wild bird to catch by hand. OK, Lord, it’s all in your hands. We’ll beat on the doors, make the phone calls and follow, trust and pray every minute…and hold on tightly to the stones.
This is from my friend Karen:
Life isn’t about waiting for life’s storms to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain.
whoo-hoo!
June 9, 2008
The Picky Peasant is up and running!!!
For now, it’s just a simple site, but I have big plans. In a nutshell, I’m developing products that are made from recycled materials. My dream is to employ folks with disabilities to help fabricate these products. The process of recycling, reusing and recreating has so many possibilities for every skill level. I’m taking it slow…researching…lots of trial and error… The brick and mortar workshop is still a figment of my imagination, but I figure if I start here and think out loud (so to speak) it will lead me to the next step. In the next year or so, I hope to do a few summer art/craft fairs…so stay tuned. For the moment, I’ll be stealing away to my basement workshop in the wee hours of the night!
By the way, for those wanting to start a little venture on an extremely tight budget, here are my start-up expenses:
online store front: etsy.com .40…yes that’s forty cents!
business cards: overnightprints.com 100 cards for $14.95 plus tax and shipping = $27
a simple one-image website: utopian.net = $65
securing a domain name for 1 year: joker.com: $12
web hosting for 1 year: utopian.net $110
ten moons for my friend
May 28, 2008
It’s maddening to ask God, “Why?” Yet, I believe that God calls us to question him so he can give us the answers. We have an old friend who for some time subscribed to the belief that God simply set everything into motion then sat back and let everything free fall as it would. Of course there is nothing in scripture to support that and I think I would go mad thinking that there was no rhyme nor reason to the universe. There is great comfort in believing that God had a plan for little ole’ me before the foundations of the earth. It seems that we must revert to simple faith…the world calls it foolishness, but to be like a child is perhaps our goal. And maybe…just maybe, God sent us children who are forever young to remind us and help us to maintain our childlike faith. Too much analysis is a downward spiral.
I remember so well when I was pregnant with Miika, thinking about how the world around me was a huge puzzle that all seemed to fit together. It dawned on me that a woman’s cycle which is generally 28 days was the same as the moon’s scheduled fullness. (Every 28 days, the moon is full.) Ten moons = 40 weeks which is how long it takes for a baby to develop in the womb. The ancients used the moon to determine fertility. No accident, but instead a wondrous master plan that was beyond man’s planning. The more I ponder how our bodies are entangled with the universe, the deeper my faith has grown. Forty days and forty nights, it rained on Noah and his family; John the baptist spent 40 days in the wilderness and so did Jesus before he was tempted by Satan. The children of Israel spent 40 years looking for the promise land. Forty seems to be a gestational number for contemplation, transitioning, holding patterns, and punishment.
The chaos of disaster and the tragedy that our world suffers always raises the question, “Why?” We must wrestle with God when a tornado turns a town to twisted sticks, when the earth swallows and spits out 10,000 victims, when a cyclone scatters and destroys countless souls, when our child is born less than perfect. There are certainly no easy answers. Are these the last days that scripture prophesied? Afterall, the Bible does say all these things would happen. Is God calling the world to turn to him? Ultimately I believe that we must go to God to find answers. Our own reasoning is futile and truth is absolute. The patterns, the cycles, the seasons, all point so clearly to someone much larger than ourselves with a big plan.
a happy mommy’s day afterall…
May 26, 2008
Yesterday was the absolute perfect day and a great re-do of Mother’s Day. My mom, kids and neighbor Cheryl went to the Constructor’s Craft Fair at Fitzgeralds in Berwyn. The only thing I bought was a hotdog for the kids, but it was great fun to see what folks had created and brought to the table…funky onesies remade from rock-n-roll T-shirts, wallets and purses crafted from inner tubes, lots of buttons and magnets, stationery, and more T-shirts…. every other crafter sported an armful of tatoos and vintage retro glasses studded with jewels. After we had taken in the fair, we went over to the Harrison Street gallery district intending to take in some fine art, but got sidetracked at the Brown Elephant a very cool thrift shop. I spotted a little Mission-style secretary without a price. I tracked down the manager to inquire…meanwhile other customers were drooling over it. While I waited, I went and guarded it! Finally 20 minutes later they slapped a few price stickers on the desk…only $55!! SOLD. I bought it, and while I was getting the van, someone else thought she had purchased it too…”Nope,” said the manager it’s already taken. Here it is:
